crowd of one

Why should I plan my day? I am NOT the Lord of my life. My Lord is the Lord of the Sabbath who owns and controls the rhythm of life. I should be using every second allocated to me to love the Lord and his people. For me to spend time mindlessly is to profane the Sabbath.   For me to spend time on fulfilling my lustful desire is to live like an unregenerate person. Time is linear and I’m created for his purpose. It is ungodly to waste time. I should plan my day so that every second I live, I live to the Lord. I should have known by now that whatever is not in the plan is not going to happen. It is painful to admit that the reason for my stunted growth as a Christian is that far too often, I do whatever I feel like doing at the moment. I should have known better.     Make plan to ensure you direct your attention to the right place.  Make plan so that you can keep track of your progress and make sure you are on the right track.  Repent, remember the lost time, how

偶有遇到喜欢看同样的电影 喜欢听同样的歌 喜欢看同样的书 喜欢玩同样的运动的人儿 难免心花怒放 但总会提醒自己 信仰不一样 世界观不一样 就算在一起玩得多好 也只是适合玩在一起而已 终究不是同一个道上的

I'm so angry  I didn't want to start the post this way but I can't pretend I am not angry  and I'm right to be angry  I'm startled like what was that  I have never seen anything like this  I can never begin to comprehend  how could someone  how could someone be so selfish  he never consider the others  how could someone be so ungrateful  he never remember what he's received from the others how could someone be so unkind  he never know how to be a decent human being  how could someone be so immature  he never have self control  well, what do I expect  it's post fall after all  until Christ returns

sometimes I don’t like all of you I look at your faces and I want to puke there’s so much rage in me  it’s unhealthy  but that’s normal for Asian no one talks about things we just sweep it under the rug and we love playing the game of let’s see who can’t take it anymore and then he can be the first one to talk I hate how peaceful it is I hate how good everyone else is at playing the game I hate how good we are at hurting each other  I hate how good we are at putting ourselves before another  I wish I could do better  and I should do better because I have the gospel Sorry Lord I have sinned against you and done what is evil in your sight 

I looked at what I wrote many years ago and thought that they’re really cool, though some of them make me cringe now.   I wonder what was I thinking and what was I feeling when I was writing each of them.  They just don’t feel familiar.  It feels like reading someone else’s writings.   I don’t feel like I know me-ed.  It’s strange.  I miss me-ed, the girl who loves to pen down her thoughts and expressing herself with words.  I want to know her.  I want to know what it feels like to be her.  It feels like I lost her somewhere along the way or forgotten her like how Woody’s owner had forgotten him.  It’s just poof and here we are, total strangers.  What happened?  I bet she didn’t see this coming.  I am almost unrecognizable.  But thank you Dash and Lily, I probably shouldn’t start a sentence with but, I promise I’m gonna change that.  It feels good to be back.

  谢谢你当我的朋友 最好的那种 不是对我最好的那种 而是最好的那种 有时候我在想 如果我是你 我都不会想要跟我当朋友 因为我真的不是一个合格的朋友 就算我会为了你做很多事 可是总会让人觉得差了点什么对吧 差在不够真，对吧？ 说真的，我真的觉得这个世界上没有人了解我 我意识到不是因为没有人要了解我 而是因为我过度保护自己 总是没有办法完全卸下心防 真不知道我在纠结什么 跟这样的人做朋友很累吧 你想要进去可是她的门总是深锁的 一直在门外徘徊久久没有离开的你 看着那个该坦诚的时候不坦诚的人 看着哪个该醒觉的时候不醒觉的人 我为你感到痛心 也为你捏了把冷汗 朋友真不是这样当的 对不起 这些日子，辛苦你了 谢谢你的不离不弃 我痛定思痛要好好地当你的朋友 最好的那种 在灵里是一家人的那种 生日快乐 ❤️️ 我的家人  

洗澡的时候 打开spotify歌单随机播放 听到了一首很久没听的歌 歌词是这样写的 They never told us Time waits for no man They never told us Time never truly heals They never told us We will never be happy They never told us We are doomed to fall Under the sky I'm just a little man To be forgotten, that's all Would having faith do any harm Perhaps, I don't know, I don't know But I'll just go on Believing and craving Laughing and crying Dreaming and flying They never told us Life is a losing game They never told us Hope only results in pain They never told us We will never be happy They never told us We are doomed to fall Under the sky I'm just a little man To be forgotten, that's all Would having faith do any harm Perhaps, I don't know, I don't know But I'll just go on Thinking and forgetting Turning and reaching Loving and lying Turning and reaching Waking and dying 歌名叫 to be forgotten 取歌名的人是天才吧 总结贴切得叫人心酸 所以呀 How can we hope in this life?  这真的不是悲观哦 看不到这是事实的人儿 可以看圣经的传道书 求神怜悯 把你的心眼打开

她左手挽着他的右手 右手食指指尖在他右手臂上的图腾上游走 她没有问他那些图腾是什么意思 只是细细看着 两个人在商场里推着购物车 他买家具 她给他的妈妈买礼物 她不记得他们说了些什么 她只是记得她很开心 所以结束之后 她很难过 当她发现她习惯的是用右手去挽左手 一切还是原来的样子啊

It might sound creepy but I had a dream about you last night  not good when I wake up and realized it's just a dream It felt so terrible that I had to put myself back to sleep again and when I'm awake later I asked myself what is this feeling that I still have can't find a word to describe it also I don't know how to deal with it  I just let it be there I didn't want to talk about it  people can be judgmental they are gonna judge me for being such a loser  for not getting over the past   it's socially unacceptable isn't it to be so constant You think I'm sick? I think I am but I can do nothing  sometimes I want to do something however realizing the gap that exists between us it's better to keep things the way they are and I wish I wouldn't have another dream like this one again good night